My Love Is INFINITE

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People call me Fera. I like kpop esp my husband Kim Myungsoo . I love reading romantic novels. I'm 1994 I'm a bit shy but as long as you know me I'm the person you can lean on.

Wednesday, April 11, 2012 @ 7:04 AM

Nell 5th Album_그리고 남겨진 것들_The Day Before

I've been waiting for Nell's comeback for so long. I know that Nell i sunder the same entertainment with Infinite but I've known them before infinite. Their music is amazing and This new album is beyond amazing. The lyric have their own feelings. And have deepest meaning. Every song is beyond amazing. The Music video for 그리고 남겨진 것(The Day Before) is so meaningful every detail of the music video is connected to the song and to many people that watching it. I have to say that Nell's is one of an artist that amaze me with their music.

Lyric english translation :

At first, it was really hard

I couldn’t acknowledge it so it was torturous

But after I accepted it

Now it’s just so sad

Actually, it’s like this -

what use is it to hold onto something that is scattering?

Only the heart will hurt more

But I wonder,

what is the purpose of living like this?

At first, I hated you a lot

I cried a lot too

But after being like that for a while,

I wondered what in the world I was doing

Actually, it’s like this -

what use is it to hold onto something that is scattering?

Only the heart will hurt more

But again I wonder,

what is the purpose of living like this?

I wonder if we’re sometimes standing in the same memory

I wonder if sometimes, time has stopped for you too

How about this break up? Is it withstandable?

Was the pain a bit less since you were ready?

How about love? Is it doable again?

Actually, I’m like this – I’m just afraid

This is all that I can say

hangeul lyric:

처음엔 많이도 힘들었지
인정할 수 없어 괴로웠지
하지만 받아들이고 나니,
이젠 그게 너무 슬픈 거지
사실은 그래 흩어지는데 붙잡아 뭐해
마음만 더 아프게
근데 이렇게 살아지는 게
어떤 의미가 있는 건가 싶긴해
처음엔 원망도 많이 했지
울기도 참 많이 울었었지
근데 계속 그렇게 있다 보니
넬(Nell) 그리고, 남겨진 것들 Lyrics
뭐하는 짓인가 싶은 거지
사실은 그래 흩어지는데 붙잡아 뭐해
마음만 더 아프게

근데 이렇게 살아지는 게
또 어떤 의미가 있는 건가 싶긴해
가끔씩은 같은 기억 속에 서있는지
너의 시간 역시 때론 멈춰버리는지
이별은 어때 견뎌질 만해
준비한 만큼 어떤 아픔도 덜 해?
사랑은 어때 다시 할 만해
사실 난 그래 그저 두렵기만 해
This is all that I can say
This is all that I can say

혼자 되뇌어보는 널 보내는 그 말
This is all that I can say
This is all that I can say

너에겐 닿지 않을 널 보내는 그 말
This is all that I can say
This is all that I can say

This song is so related to my relationship in my life with my friend or my family or my crush. Mostly with my friend. It was all true.

i hope they will hear this song and think carefully what they did to me.

I cried a lot because of them but it's worthless to cry for them. i cried everyday think of them . did i hurt them by the way they treat me. sometimes I wished i was never in their life.

Wednesday, April 4, 2012 @ 9:07 AM

what I feel now

what to know what i feel now...

I feel terrible about myself . I just have to let this out here. why do I have to go through these hard times. It's just hard but horrible. sometimes I feel like want to do a terrible things like the thing that imagine in my head was so scary but in reality what I do is just stay quiet and hiding in a dark corner . It's the thing that I have to do for others and also for my own good . I don't know , i think I just have to do that. Is this I have to go through everyday. feeling tired, helpless, being used, alone, terrible and that I don't have any direction where I have to go so that I can be happy. Once I said to myself that it's okay, if I have to go through this everyday so everyone don't get hurt . But sometimes i think what if i get hurt , everything is gonna be okay but it's me that gonna change forever because of them. So don't blame me if I change , it is because of you.

And lately these things keep happening to me. I thought that person and me become closer but from my point of view, that person was just using me like a recycle bag . I don't know but , I always feel like that these days. I'm not the one that close to that person. I'm just an accompany to that person. Well, i feel like getting used to it now. So, i don't what I supposed to feel now, angry, sad, grateful or I should just leave that person or distance myself but from deep of my heart I still want to have a close relationship with that person. It's just I don't have to be so close for my own good. Just being a part of that person makes me so happy . Because that person also make me so happy . I just need to tell that person that I need some space now. So I can calm myself. I being hurt for a million times, sometimes I don't have a feeling and no heart because of that.

I just want to be a part of something important. just once. I know why i'm acting like this, because I am a very sensitive person, always feels jealous, selfish . I'm sorry for being like this but trying really hard to held it back for all the people I love. But it doesn't reached them. I think. I don't care being used if that makes them happy . But most of the time, I just feel like want to live far away from here , from the things that happening to me here and go to a place that I can start a new life with new people so I can get back the old me. I'm not myself right now. But I can't . It feels like there's a wall that keep me from walking away. That someone tell's me that I have to go through this for myself. And I accept that .

feel like wan to be alone but I can't , want to be happy but who can make me happy ... myself?, want to get my old self but it can't change back. Feel so terrible for myself that I have to suffer this. But I know someday I will find my own happiness .

I don't want to be hurt a million time again. I think it hurt so much more than that . I endure it cause I know that there are more people that suffer more that what I have to face now. I should be grateful. I know...

you, that person, them : the people that I know.

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Wednesday, April 11, 2012 @ 7:04 AM Nell 5th Album_그리고 남겨진 것들_The Day Before I've been waiting for Nell's comeback for so long. I know that Nell i sunder the same entertainment with Infinite but I've known them before infinite. Their music is amazing and This new album is beyond amazing. The lyric have their own feelings. And have deepest meaning. Every song is beyond amazing. The Music video for 그리고 남겨진 것(The Day Before) is so meaningful every detail of the music video is connected to the song and to many people that watching it. I have to say that Nell's is one of an artist that amaze me with their music. Lyric english translation : At first, it was really hard I couldn’t acknowledge it so it was torturous But after I accepted it Now it’s just so sad Actually, it’s like this - what use is it to hold onto something that is scattering? Only the heart will hurt more But I wonder, what is the purpose of living like this? At first, I hated you a lot I cried a lot too But after being like that for a while, I wondered what in the world I was doing Actually, it’s like this - what use is it to hold onto something that is scattering? Only the heart will hurt more But again I wonder, what is the purpose of living like this? I wonder if we’re sometimes standing in the same memory I wonder if sometimes, time has stopped for you too How about this break up? Is it withstandable? Was the pain a bit less since you were ready? How about love? Is it doable again? Actually, I’m like this – I’m just afraid This is all that I can say hangeul lyric: 처음엔 많이도 힘들었지 인정할 수 없어 괴로웠지 하지만 받아들이고 나니, 이젠 그게 너무 슬픈 거지 사실은 그래 흩어지는데 붙잡아 뭐해 마음만 더 아프게 근데 이렇게 살아지는 게 어떤 의미가 있는 건가 싶긴해 처음엔 원망도 많이 했지 울기도 참 많이 울었었지 근데 계속 그렇게 있다 보니 넬(Nell) 그리고, 남겨진 것들 Lyrics 뭐하는 짓인가 싶은 거지 사실은 그래 흩어지는데 붙잡아 뭐해 마음만 더 아프게 근데 이렇게 살아지는 게 또 어떤 의미가 있는 건가 싶긴해 가끔씩은 같은 기억 속에 서있는지 너의 시간 역시 때론 멈춰버리는지 이별은 어때 견뎌질 만해 준비한 만큼 어떤 아픔도 덜 해? 사랑은 어때 다시 할 만해 사실 난 그래 그저 두렵기만 해 This is all that I can say This is all that I can say 혼자 되뇌어보는 널 보내는 그 말 This is all that I can say This is all that I can say 너에겐 닿지 않을 널 보내는 그 말 This is all that I can say This is all that I can say This song is so related to my relationship in my life with my friend or my family or my crush. Mostly with my friend. It was all true. i hope they will hear this song and think carefully what they did to me. I cried a lot because of them but it's worthless to cry for them. i cried everyday think of them . did i hurt them by the way they treat me. sometimes I wished i was never in their life. back to top?
Wednesday, April 4, 2012 @ 9:07 AM what I feel now what to know what i feel now... I feel terrible about myself . I just have to let this out here. why do I have to go through these hard times. It's just hard but horrible. sometimes I feel like want to do a terrible things like the thing that imagine in my head was so scary but in reality what I do is just stay quiet and hiding in a dark corner . It's the thing that I have to do for others and also for my own good . I don't know , i think I just have to do that. Is this I have to go through everyday. feeling tired, helpless, being used, alone, terrible and that I don't have any direction where I have to go so that I can be happy. Once I said to myself that it's okay, if I have to go through this everyday so everyone don't get hurt . But sometimes i think what if i get hurt , everything is gonna be okay but it's me that gonna change forever because of them. So don't blame me if I change , it is because of you. And lately these things keep happening to me. I thought that person and me become closer but from my point of view, that person was just using me like a recycle bag . I don't know but , I always feel like that these days. I'm not the one that close to that person. I'm just an accompany to that person. Well, i feel like getting used to it now. So, i don't what I supposed to feel now, angry, sad, grateful or I should just leave that person or distance myself but from deep of my heart I still want to have a close relationship with that person. It's just I don't have to be so close for my own good. Just being a part of that person makes me so happy . Because that person also make me so happy . I just need to tell that person that I need some space now. So I can calm myself. I being hurt for a million times, sometimes I don't have a feeling and no heart because of that. I just want to be a part of something important. just once. I know why i'm acting like this, because I am a very sensitive person, always feels jealous, selfish . I'm sorry for being like this but trying really hard to held it back for all the people I love. But it doesn't reached them. I think. I don't care being used if that makes them happy . But most of the time, I just feel like want to live far away from here , from the things that happening to me here and go to a place that I can start a new life with new people so I can get back the old me. I'm not myself right now. But I can't . It feels like there's a wall that keep me from walking away. That someone tell's me that I have to go through this for myself. And I accept that . feel like wan to be alone but I can't , want to be happy but who can make me happy ... myself?, want to get my old self but it can't change back. Feel so terrible for myself that I have to suffer this. But I know someday I will find my own happiness . I don't want to be hurt a million time again. I think it hurt so much more than that . I endure it cause I know that there are more people that suffer more that what I have to face now. I should be grateful. I know... you, that person, them : the people that I know. back to top?

monthly archive August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 April 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 September 2011 November 2011 December 2011 January 2012 February 2012 March 2012 April 2012 May 2012 December 2012 April 2013 January 2014 August 2014	recent entries Best and The Worst Year? 2013 (HOPE) HEY! It's been a long time since i wrote my last entry ... 2012 (+ about me ) trhough my phone things are not going well Nell 5th Album_그리고 남겨진 것들_The Day Before what I feel now I will get this phone : Samsung Wave Y
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