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People call me Fera. I like kpop esp my husband Kim Myungsoo . I love reading romantic novels. I'm 1994 I'm a bit shy but as long as you know me I'm the person you can lean on.

My first official post Here in 2014 is about what happen in 2013. I'll start by how I my life being a form 6 students. From what I've been through , from this form 6 thing I get to do my first official assignments and it's kinda hard for me to finish I have to 4 research and it's individual. But I think there nothing special about being in a form 6. There are more things that affect me really deep from last year.

So this is it, from what I can say that the first half of last year was all good time. It's all about my birthday, how I got my first laptop, how it was a greatcelebration of my birthday, I got good grades I think for my form 6, and so on. But the the second half of the year comes with misfortunes. It doesn't come all at once but little by little it him me bad. Actually there are  a lot of good things happen also from the second half but sadly I can't remember all of it. So bad news comes first.

The bad thing is I think it's just only one big bad thing happen to me... It was only the at the end of last year that I've got a memory that's gonna haunt me for the rest of my life though. My family all got the signs that misfortune going to come to us but all of us doesn't have sense of it. It was when I saw black snake two time, the first time is at the kitchen of my house and the second time was when we went to vacation at kudat and at my parents room at the resort. So then the tragedy happen after we cameback few days after we cameback. It was on Monday, everything was usual, I woke up in the morning sensing that it was a normal Monday morning. All of my family finished our breakfast, and my parents with my two little brother are going out to do their haircut. It was for their school haircut. So I said that I will stay at home cuz I didn't shower yet so I am lazy to go with them. It was I don't know maybe at 11.30 they leave the house. So I sense that nothing bad will happen though after all I stayed at home at still it safe. But then after 10 minute they leave the house I was playing with my laptop at the living room with the front door open wide and it was a bright day at first, then comes rain, a heavy rain. At first I heard sound at the kitchen so I assumed that it was cat who got in to the kitchen. So leave it. After that a stranger came in from the kitchen and there where it started, all of the time when that guy in my house I'd try not to cry or scream because he was holding knife at that knife was at my stomach so I'll try to be calm and try to think the right time to run away, I gave him all of my mom's gold, then he left me at the living room to look for the another thing he want to steal, then that is the right time for me to take action, at that time my hand, feet, mouth and my eyes was tied up by the guy. But he didn't do it tight so I can free myself. I see the gate and my front door are not locked so I ran away after that with all the strength I have just to go out form that house in the heavy rain. That's it,... That guy gave me a big black worse memory ever that I have to remember for the rest of my life. I never see myself that was like that, shocked,  I can't speak, just crying and cry hard like sometime I just want it to erase but I can't that's why I keep crying because I can't do anything about it, I don't have the power to turn turn back time and wish I was this and that, I lost all my strength, all I can do at that time just cry, cry, cry and cry... I felt so fragile at that time.  I even don't have the gut to go back to the. For all these time until now, I just kept this alien feeling inside me.. I'm still waiting to let it out at the right time...  but things around me makes it hard to let it out. So I'll wait.

I hope after this misfortune, comes more good thing.

That's the bad news, some good thing that happen last year is I really started my diet and I became more healthier and more skinnier that I was before,  I am really happy about that. After all I am so insecure about my body now I gain my  confidence. I also change, I try to become more mature and face things. I like when people compliment me ^^.

So that's it,  last year was not good. I hope this year brings more good thing to my life. Change me to a greater person and to be more grateful to Allah.

P/s : please stay by my side even when it's hard for you. Because you don't know how hard it is for me to. Just be there and understand.

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It's been a really really long time since I've posted my last post here. From now on I hope I can be as active as I was before or when I first started posting on my blog. So wait for my next post ^^. or maybe tomorrow

See ya!

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